An Explanation

So, when I posted last I did not know how to put what I was feelng into words. Now it's Monday, about two weeks later and I'm still not sure I know how, but I'm going to try. You see, on the Thursday before Good Friday (me and major holidays do not go well together) my temp position was downsized due to the economy. It wasn't personal, it was just one of those things that happen when your company's sales are down to almost half of what they were the previous year. They decided they could handle the work with just the temp they already had and a part time person. So there I am, once again, made redundant (as the British so eloquently put it). So, let's so do brief recap of the last four or five months of my life, in no particular order other than how things come up in my brain:

--position of eight years eliminated
--graduated with master of arts degree in communication
--looked for lots and lots of jobs. Nada out there
--registered with temp agencies
--auditioned for a musical and made it (yay). Where I have also made many new friends.
--hired for a temp to hire position
--auditioned for another musical. Got in. Yay! More new and wonderful friends made
--laid off from temp position
--get in the Virginia Beach Public Schools substitute teacher system (have yet to get an assignment)
--apply at lens crafters (friend works there)
--randomly hear from a company that I pursued back in February, come in for 2 interviews, get really excited about it after the 2nd interview only to hear from them (via email of all things) that they went with another candidate. That one really stung.
--Freak out!
--hear about a position from a friend I met in the newest musical--which I've now applied for and hope to hear from....sigh
--Lens Crafters has yet to call, I checked with my friend and he said they've just been really busy.

Meanwhile, I receive my last severance check this week and I'm getting nervous about paying bills. I have some thoughts about my possible future and steps to take but I have some tests to pass first, and also need to get my feet wet on the sub teaching thing, to test myself. I am in the process of transferring all of my 403(b) (like a 401(k)) into a personal IRA through Fidelity....if things don't happen with a job soon I'm going to have to cash it out and pay off most of my bills (sadly, after penalties it won't cover all of my debt, but it'll get me really close). I am really trying to see the silver lining in the situation I am in. I know I should be grateful to at least have a roof over my head (thanks to my parents) and food to eat (too much! really need to lose weight)....so I promise you, I am grateful. But this year so far has really, truly sucked. big time.

there are no words

to describe what i'm feeling this evening. So, just know..that I'm out here..feeling things...that I can't describe.

well, i've been gone a long time..

pretty much since I started that new job and rehearsals kicked into high gear! I promise i'll let you know about all of these things when I have a moment to decompress...until then..this is just a post to earn another entry in a giveaway! Sorry! Here is the info:

http://www.thebigpieceofcake.com/2009/04/as-good-as-cake-giveaway-bags-by.html

Check Kate out, I found her through my friend, Ainsley...I really enjoy her blogs.